Wedding Crashers

There comes a time in life when your group of friends grow up and start to get into serious relationships. Soon, you start getting invitations to weddings and engagement parties. It seems as if EVERYONE is getting engaged, and soon your social life flourishes into an excitement of open bars and dancing around with your date’s tie on your head. 

Weddings are classy and crazy all at once. The ceremony tends to be a sweet reminder that love does exist, gives you something to reflect upon, look forward too, or be thankful for – depending on your personal situation. My favourite part is when the bride walks into the room and her soon-to-be husband sees her for the first time – that look on his face when he sees her beautiful dress is classic. It gives me goose bumps no matter how many times I’ve been to a wedding.

The reception is surely the best part – everyone is on a natural high from the excitement of seeing two people in love, sealing the deal forever. At this point, people start drinking, only because the bride and groom take pictures for ten hours. Things get messy, and that’s when the ultimate memories are made. No one remembers a wedding for how classy it was – but everyone remembers a wedding for the outrageousness and ridiculous antics of the guests.

1.) Do not wear white – the bride wears white ONLY

                                                     Photo from the movie ‘Monster In-Law’

 Remember that scene in Monster In-Law, where Jane Fonda (mother-in-law) walks into the room wearing a beautiful white gown on her future daughter-in-law's wedding day? I promise you, at your own caution, never ever ever ever, try to upstage the bride. Bride's are like permanently PMS-ing zombies, destroying everyone and anything that get's in their way. Bride's are also kind of like dinosaurs. But not any kind of dino's, more like T-Rex's. They will eat the living sh*t out of you if you try to wear white. Think of it this way, if you wear white, you'll only end up in red since the bride will tear you a new one. hehe. But seriously.

2.) Don’t drink too much – no one likes that person

I was at a wedding last night, and I saw many people having a good time. I also saw many people having too good of a time. I feel like open bars are trick questions. People get greedy when there is free liquor, and only when you drink like a camel for fear of Vodka running out, you get tricked into your alter-ego alcoholic self. Don't be fooled! You may feel like your invincible, making people laugh at your jokes around you. Nuh-uh honey. Those people are laughing at you. When your on the dance floor, twerking and showing off that sprinkler move, all while puking into random table centre pieces that house the beautiful white lillies that the planner has set up, you know it's time to leave. Also, when the speeches begin, you don't want to be that a-hole in the back screaming incoherent messages and jokes. Go home Lohan. 

3.) Never tell a speech if: your too drunk, an ex of the bride or groom, or if you have nothing good to say.

Life is almost too easy when we have movies to learn from. The Wedding Singer has a scene in which a man gives an excruciating painful and embarrassing speech to his brother who is getting married - but ends up making an idiot of himself all the while embarrassing his whole family to the point of tears. Or, in The Hangover, when one of the actors gives too much info while speaking at his best friends rehearsal party. If you have any ounce of jealousy, and you know you are set to give a speech, fake an illness, because no one wants to hear you bitch. You will never win, it's not your party. When it's your party, you may bitch all you want. For now, fake an illness and get out. 

Photo courtesy of 'The Hangover'

                                                                                                                         

4.) Do NOT fight over the bouquet

There's something sexy about a woman who can hold her own. There is nothing sexy about a woman who want's to get married so ridiculously bad that she punches out her best-friend in order to get that $12 buck bouquet (most bride's don't even throw their actual bouquet). In fact, I make sure that I'm first row during the bouquet toss, in order to watch chicks get crazy.

Do you think that it's going to make your boyfriend propose to you? He might do the opposite and get a restraining order. Do you think that this bouquet will magically build a boyfriend for you? NO. If you want a damn bouquet so bad, go down to the dollar store and buy some fake flowers - this way you can have them forever. Otherwise, I feel like I'm watching UFC fights for free - minus the tight shorts.

A Journalist's Break

Photo courtesy of Amazon.ca

I read a book recently called How the Air-India Bombers Got Away With Murder: Loss of Faith by Kim Bolan. It was, as expected, a riveting report, but also documented the struggles in which a journalist encounters in order to get that ‘great story.’

As students, we have found out that it can be quite a struggle when it comes to ethics - what to publish, what not to publish. This is a great example of a determined female journalist who went above and beyond to find the truth in the very public spectacle.

In 1985, Canada experienced it's first terrorist act with the Air-India bombings that killed 329 people aboard Flight 182 in an explosion off the coast of Ireland.

Bolan tells us about Sikhism, a religion from India that has a lengthy history of conflict in India for relentlessly fighting over a fully independent homeland in Punjab.

A group of ‘Sikh’ extremists called the Babbar Khalsa, are known for engaging in a 20-year dispute against Air-India and Indian diplomats over the takeover of the holy temple. Not only was this a dangerous story for Bolan herself to cover, but it turned out to be for the people around her as well.

The Holy Temple, courtesy of jewishmiracles.insightonthenews.net

I found this book a key example of the up's and down’s of journalism, and how sometimes being on a roll can lead to death threats, and even bodily harm. Bolan’s research launched several police investigations in the Air-India bombings, which resulted in charges of two men. In 1998, Bolan’s family home was victimized in a drive by shooting, which was meant to target her family. In her book, Bolan displays a hand written letter from somebody that advocates her death. She makes it clear that the deeper you dig as a journalist, and the more you uncover, the more people will try to use power to stop you from finding answers.

Although this book didn’t necessarily have a happy ending, it gave a great narrative account of how journalism was key to informing the rest of the world. A few men were tried for the murders, but only one of them, Inderjit Singh Reyat, was convicted to 15 years in prison for the bombing.
If it were not for Bolan’s investigations, the Justice system would not be under scrutiny the way it had, causing people to lose faith. 

This type of Journalism was much like muckraking, informing the public of a scandal in order to enlighten everyone of Canada's laws' and policies that failed to prosecute the others involved.

 

                                                  Photo courtesy of www.aerorise.com

Before this book, I wasn’t aware that Canada had even had such threats, and I feel inspired by Bolan’s investigations, especially because she is a woman journalist exploring an Islam world. At times, I found the book to be confusing, only because Bolan crams years of work into 600 pages or so. Interestingly, I learnt that Bolan was a journalist 'rookie,' at the Vancouver Sun when she first started investigating Flight 182, which helped me relate since I am starting out myself, as well.

The CreComm Edition of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

Photo courtesy of dailymail.co.uk

Girls and guys are often accused of being from different planets. Harmless comments often have different perspectives or meanings when it comes to different sexes, I asked people from the Creative Communications program about some comments and what they mean:


You look good today:

Guy: "I look good today? If it's the seventh day in a row wearing a shirt, I know your lying. If you compliment my shirt on the 2nd day I'm wearing it, you want to sleep with me."

Girl: "He think's i'm pretty"

Guy: "Oh f ya. That made my day"

Girl: "He wants to marry me"

Girl: "Do I have something on my face?"

Guy: "She wants to bang me"


It's not you it's me:

Guy: "Are we talking about a fart?"

Girl: "It's definitely me."

Guy: "This is them trying to sugarcoat, there not feeling it"

Girl: "He totally has another girlfriend"

Girl: "He's gay"


Do I look fat today?

Guy: "I plead the fifth"

Guy: "If you think you're fat"....*jiggles stomach*

Guy: "Than she goes eating an entire jar of Nutella..."

Girl: "Such a turn-off, guys aren't supposed to ask"


Your hanging out with the girls/guys again?

Guy: "Well I'm not just going to not hang out with them

Guy: *Put's on glasses* "Deal with it"

Girl: "He loves me!"

Girl: "I think it's his way of showing he cares and wants to spend time with me, so I would probably stay home with him"



Some of these examples made me refer back to the Genderlect Theory. Studied in the 1970's, genderlect can be a tad outdated in some of the examples, although I believe there is substance behind the claim that speech and social norms are associated with a particular gender. Deborah Tannen suggests that part of this conversational difference is because females seek connection and men seek status.

For example, men will avoid anything "emotional," preferring only solid facts. Women generally talk about their feelings and relationships. They speak more about emotional elements, opposite of men, and will expect others to do the same.  When it comes to seeking status, men  label emotion as a sign of weakness. Men prefer to be in objective positions, and tend to 'tell' others more easily than woman. Another example from Tannen is that men thus tend to use jokes and stories promoting themselves when they are conversing with others. Men are said to put themselves in the story, placing themselves as the hero or the person who solves the problem or saves the day (hense status).  In stories that women tell, they are likely to make themselves the victims. They are quick to tell others how they and others have been emotionally hurt. Woman tend to make empathetic connections rather than worry too much about status. Sound familiar? Like I said, a little outdated, but I can see a lot of truth to the theory. Tannen may be on to something.....

Life Hacks for CreComm

When you’re in CreComm, time is of the essence. Sleep becomes foreign, a good solid meal becomes a myth and extra curricular activities are few and far between. Much like we make notes in class, life needs to have a “cheat sheet.” In order to be prepared, you must prepare to be prepared. See the pun? Here are a few hacks that I’ve come across (and used!) in order to keep my sanity, as well as my hair from pulling it out. Thank me later!

You want to drink a beverage, but got no bottle opener? No problem. One major advantage of being CreComm means that you will be 100% likely to carry around a Mac adapter, or should I say "adapter." Mac win's for best multipurpose electronic, we will be raising our bottles to cheers them in unison. Bless Mac's heart. 

Ain't nobody got time for cleaning. NOBODY. Except maybe mom who has no choice when you leave your dirty dishes in the sink. I usually grant myself five minutes for eating in the morning in order to get an extra 3.5 minutes of sleep which will benefit me more through out the day. Want brownie points? Clean the blender for mom, but don't tell her how. With this little trick, there will be no need for Kitchen Counsellor. EAT IT DIRTY DISHES. 

Since wine has many benefits for our health, as well as our mental state on weekends, it's imperative that we know how to clean up ourselves after the top on our sippy cup falls off. I usually drink white wine to avoid this problem, but if you feel the need to be a rebel, here's a little trick to avoid explaining that you WEREN'T in a wet t-shirt contest. Red spills = white thrills. Use any white wine to dab up the stain! Ta-da!

This is very embarrassing. The middle part of a sandal comes loose and you fall on your face. If i can save someone from taking an unnecessary spill, than this Lifestyle Blog is all worth it. I promise you, flip flop spills are never graceful, nor pretty. Friends will be stifling giggles while trying to help you off the ground. Fingers will be pointing at you in a mocking fashion. Save yourself the embarrassment and make your sandals the most bad ass, fail proof weapons of mass destructions you've ever owned!

Firewood is over rated. Doritos is where it's at. This will be an ample life hack and a possibly wonderful survival mechanism if you ever find yourself lost, in the middle of the forest, cold and crying, trying to stay warm in your stylish but inconvenient LuLu Lemon jacket. Always carry Doritos. They can be used for food and fire. Try not to waste them though, burning them is always sad to a hungry, chip savage.

More to come.....