Why I Decided to Expose Myself

Online bullying is one of the main topics today in the world, due to recent jumps in suicide among young teens and adults, declaring that people have belittled them to the point of no return.

This isn’t an easy subject for me to talk about. I was harmlessly bullied in elementary, kids can be cruel at that certain age, something I attribute as part of growing up.

Junior high was a lot better of an experience for myself, I had great friend’s and we all hung out in a big group, everyone was equals.

I had few hard months in high school. At times it was tough to deal with others, but in a way it made it easier to relate to others with social problems, or the stigma of being “different.” It made me a better person in a sense since I stopped gossiping as much and thought before I spoke so that the feelings’ of other people were reconized first and foremost.

In the last year and a half, I’ve settled down with my high school sweetheart and I have been enjoying the last few years of University immensely, proud of who I have become and the work ethic I’ve adopted.

Unfortunately, there are vindictive people who use the Internet to say things that they are too afraid to say out loud. 

The website, nobullying.com reported 52% of young people report being cyber bullied. Furthermore, 33% of the young people who reported cyber bullying against them said that their bullies used online threats.

I was once posted onto a gossip website, completely slamming my character. It was extremely upsetting to not be able to defend myself. 

I went through the initial emotions of devestation, crying, feeling sorry for myself, wanting to defend myself to getting mad. All I kept thinking is, “have I hurt someone so bad that they feel this is okay to do?”

Over the next few weeks and several revolations, I questioned my actions towards other people. Since I have been bullied before myself, I’m extremely careful not to target others the way I've been targeted, therefore, I try my best not to upset anyone or make enemies. I raked my mind and my friend’s list trying to figure out who would have done such a hurtful thing, or who didn't have the guts to just talk it out. 

In the process of figuring out who the culprit was, I mended a few friendships and strengthened others. I realized that it's important not to keep grudges and be more open to other's feelings instead of just my own. 

Finally, after the initial shock wore off, I can 100% say that I just don’t care! The most important thing that matters isn’t who believes the article and the lies the poster wanted people to believe, all that matters is if I love myself enough to essentially brush it off!

My friends and family know the real me and that’s really all I care about. Facts such as my obsession with helping animals, my love for going to the library often to read romance novels and spending as much time with my grandparents during the week to bake are most certainly never posted online, the things that ACTUALLY define me! The whole idea is to pick out negative parts and roast your identity!

I’m not saying it’s always easy to ignore rude comments made towards your image, but give yourself a break, everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes. As long as you are kind to others and apply empathy in the right situations, than you have nothing to be ashamed about.

All you can do to be a better person is to have humanity. Caring about others as you would yourself will make you a better person that people will look up to. If your aware of these things, than you can make better choices that benefit your character.

So why did I expose myself?

Because it’s okay to still be confident and show others that bullying doesn’t have to define you.

You know your getting old when....

The days are gone when I dance the night away in a mini skirt that's two sizes too small and high heels that feel like torture devices. In the past, it would be shameful to waste a Friday night on the couch, watching re-runs from the previous week.

Throwback to eight years ago when I was 19, I would be a few beers deep and just getting my night started by this time. Ah, the perks of being young.

My "going out" clothes, as I like to call them, practically have dust from hanging in the closet.

When the heck did everything change from going out every night and champing hangovers to staying in and cuddling with my cat?

I've always enjoyed spending time alone, for as long as I can remember, I was always the type of girl who preferred to sit by herself and read. But don't get me wrong, when the weekend rolled by, I didn't miss a beat to go out.

Now in the present, I sit here in my flannel pyjamas, with left over remnants of thai on my tyrannosaurus rex t-shirt, my dog on one leg and cat on the other. The biggest problem I have tonight is whether I want to drink Earl Grey or Scarlet Fever tea.

This feels like heaven.

Being comfortable with yourself is truly crucial in order to collect your sanity and find out what kind of person you are. I could spend hours putting around in my room, cleaning and organizing, I also like to scrapbook and watch old movies on Netflix.

I reminisce to some of the amazing times that I've had dancing under disco balls and laughing with friends on Osborne Village patios.

I will always remember these times fondly, but now my life consists of school, my boyfriend, family, close friends' and good food. I also can't ever get enough sleep.

Some may consider it "boring" to stay home on a weekend night and catch up on me-time, but I believe it represents a change in my life towards becoming more independent and comfortable, I'm not afraid to miss out and instead I'm doing what makes me happy.

Besides, if you can't spend time with yourself, who's going to want to spend time with you? :)

                       How I used to feel on a Friday
                                                                                                              phdstress.com

Check out this page:

The 10 Best Things About Spending A Friday Night At Home 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/13/friday-night-at-home_n_3922178.html

Lost My Blog Virginity!

My first post!!! whooo hooo!

Hello all, my name is Courtney Nelson and I wanted to post a little bit about myself so you had a sense of who I am when reading my thoughts.

Instead of writing you multiple paragraphs about what colour my underwear is, I’m going to list ten facts about myself that I consider interesting and important to my character!

1.     Animals: I love ANIMALS! Dogs, cats, monkeys, rabbits, you name it! I have two dogs and a cat whom I would give my unborn child if need be…. which would just be weird.

2.     I hate Turkey: I went to Europe in 2011 and stopped in at Turkey while on a cruise. I went into a Mosque, and in order to respect the religion, I wore long sleeves. This was clearly not enough; as I walked through the doors, I had five men throwing blankets on me to cover my bare knees. Since I am a very dramatic person, I freaked out because I was scared and have never been back to Turkey since.

3.     I’ve been in a horror movie: Not literally, but close. While in Dominican Republic last year, I contracted an immune disease, which led to having surgery in the country. I woke up on the surgical table after being put under, only to find out that I was ALONE. I rolled off the table with my IV and crawled to the big metal doors that said “Salida.” I hurled myself through the doors and screamed for my friends. As they came running down the hall, they were shocked because no one told them I was being cut open and put under anaesthetic. To be continued….

4.     I’ve owned two residences in the last six years: I moved out at age 20 and bought a brand new condominium, conveniently behind a 7-11 establishment. After I consumed unimaginable amounts of hot dogs and five cent candy, I built a house and than sold it within a year because I craved the poor life of a student.

5.     I am a cougar: Not by official standards but I am very aware of the fact that I am a “mature” student, compared to others in my program. At 27 years old, I decided to quit my job at the Provincial Government and take a leap of faith in order to go back to school. So far, I am happy with my decision.

6.     I love reality TV: I could sit in front of the tube with a bag of ketchup chips and continuously watch ridiculously cheesy reality programs for days. Days’ is an understatement, I could watch for weeks! If I could quit my job and watch reality TV all day, I’d totally be okay with eating Mr. Noodle and 99 cent Kraft Dinner meals in order to survive.

7.     I love dying my hair: It makes me feel like a new woman. Every time I went through a break up in my “younger” years, I would run to Wal-Mart for a ten-dollar box of L’Oreal hair dye in order to transform my locks. It had nothing to do with insecurity, I just loved the idea of starting fresh with a new identity. Out with the old, in with the new! UPDATE: My hair has stayed blonde since I’ve been in a year and a half relationship.

8.     I have bad luck: Bring on the pity party, I feel like my bad luck has not only arrived in three’s, but four’s and five’s and so on. From klutzy accidents to unfortunate incidents, I usually get the bad news if there is any around. I also have never won a social prize. My best friend has won 20. Boo.

9.     I love to read: Romance. Romance. Romance. Sigh. I like to entertain my unrealistic thoughts with ridiculously perfect men and woman in perfect relationships. I than like to ask my boyfriend to do ridiculous things like pick me up on dates in a horse drawn carriage, carrying five bouquets of roses and hiding a litter of kittens under his tuxedo flap.

10. I’m an only child: If you see me frail my arms and kick my legs in order to get my way in the middle of class, you may understand where my actions’ stem from. Kidding. Very cliché, but my parent’s are my best friend’s and I have weekly dates with my grandparents. Family is important to me because they are all I have. During my childhood, my father had the unfortunate job of riding with me on all the rollercoasters at Disney World. I plan to have two children to avoid this duty.