Wedding Crashers

There comes a time in life when your group of friends grow up and start to get into serious relationships. Soon, you start getting invitations to weddings and engagement parties. It seems as if EVERYONE is getting engaged, and soon your social life flourishes into an excitement of open bars and dancing around with your date’s tie on your head. 

Weddings are classy and crazy all at once. The ceremony tends to be a sweet reminder that love does exist, gives you something to reflect upon, look forward too, or be thankful for – depending on your personal situation. My favourite part is when the bride walks into the room and her soon-to-be husband sees her for the first time – that look on his face when he sees her beautiful dress is classic. It gives me goose bumps no matter how many times I’ve been to a wedding.

The reception is surely the best part – everyone is on a natural high from the excitement of seeing two people in love, sealing the deal forever. At this point, people start drinking, only because the bride and groom take pictures for ten hours. Things get messy, and that’s when the ultimate memories are made. No one remembers a wedding for how classy it was – but everyone remembers a wedding for the outrageousness and ridiculous antics of the guests.

1.) Do not wear white – the bride wears white ONLY

                                                     Photo from the movie ‘Monster In-Law’

 Remember that scene in Monster In-Law, where Jane Fonda (mother-in-law) walks into the room wearing a beautiful white gown on her future daughter-in-law's wedding day? I promise you, at your own caution, never ever ever ever, try to upstage the bride. Bride's are like permanently PMS-ing zombies, destroying everyone and anything that get's in their way. Bride's are also kind of like dinosaurs. But not any kind of dino's, more like T-Rex's. They will eat the living sh*t out of you if you try to wear white. Think of it this way, if you wear white, you'll only end up in red since the bride will tear you a new one. hehe. But seriously.

2.) Don’t drink too much – no one likes that person

I was at a wedding last night, and I saw many people having a good time. I also saw many people having too good of a time. I feel like open bars are trick questions. People get greedy when there is free liquor, and only when you drink like a camel for fear of Vodka running out, you get tricked into your alter-ego alcoholic self. Don't be fooled! You may feel like your invincible, making people laugh at your jokes around you. Nuh-uh honey. Those people are laughing at you. When your on the dance floor, twerking and showing off that sprinkler move, all while puking into random table centre pieces that house the beautiful white lillies that the planner has set up, you know it's time to leave. Also, when the speeches begin, you don't want to be that a-hole in the back screaming incoherent messages and jokes. Go home Lohan. 

3.) Never tell a speech if: your too drunk, an ex of the bride or groom, or if you have nothing good to say.

Life is almost too easy when we have movies to learn from. The Wedding Singer has a scene in which a man gives an excruciating painful and embarrassing speech to his brother who is getting married - but ends up making an idiot of himself all the while embarrassing his whole family to the point of tears. Or, in The Hangover, when one of the actors gives too much info while speaking at his best friends rehearsal party. If you have any ounce of jealousy, and you know you are set to give a speech, fake an illness, because no one wants to hear you bitch. You will never win, it's not your party. When it's your party, you may bitch all you want. For now, fake an illness and get out. 

Photo courtesy of 'The Hangover'

                                                                                                                         

4.) Do NOT fight over the bouquet

There's something sexy about a woman who can hold her own. There is nothing sexy about a woman who want's to get married so ridiculously bad that she punches out her best-friend in order to get that $12 buck bouquet (most bride's don't even throw their actual bouquet). In fact, I make sure that I'm first row during the bouquet toss, in order to watch chicks get crazy.

Do you think that it's going to make your boyfriend propose to you? He might do the opposite and get a restraining order. Do you think that this bouquet will magically build a boyfriend for you? NO. If you want a damn bouquet so bad, go down to the dollar store and buy some fake flowers - this way you can have them forever. Otherwise, I feel like I'm watching UFC fights for free - minus the tight shorts.

A Journalist's Break

Photo courtesy of Amazon.ca

I read a book recently called How the Air-India Bombers Got Away With Murder: Loss of Faith by Kim Bolan. It was, as expected, a riveting report, but also documented the struggles in which a journalist encounters in order to get that ‘great story.’

As students, we have found out that it can be quite a struggle when it comes to ethics - what to publish, what not to publish. This is a great example of a determined female journalist who went above and beyond to find the truth in the very public spectacle.

In 1985, Canada experienced it's first terrorist act with the Air-India bombings that killed 329 people aboard Flight 182 in an explosion off the coast of Ireland.

Bolan tells us about Sikhism, a religion from India that has a lengthy history of conflict in India for relentlessly fighting over a fully independent homeland in Punjab.

A group of ‘Sikh’ extremists called the Babbar Khalsa, are known for engaging in a 20-year dispute against Air-India and Indian diplomats over the takeover of the holy temple. Not only was this a dangerous story for Bolan herself to cover, but it turned out to be for the people around her as well.

The Holy Temple, courtesy of jewishmiracles.insightonthenews.net

I found this book a key example of the up's and down’s of journalism, and how sometimes being on a roll can lead to death threats, and even bodily harm. Bolan’s research launched several police investigations in the Air-India bombings, which resulted in charges of two men. In 1998, Bolan’s family home was victimized in a drive by shooting, which was meant to target her family. In her book, Bolan displays a hand written letter from somebody that advocates her death. She makes it clear that the deeper you dig as a journalist, and the more you uncover, the more people will try to use power to stop you from finding answers.

Although this book didn’t necessarily have a happy ending, it gave a great narrative account of how journalism was key to informing the rest of the world. A few men were tried for the murders, but only one of them, Inderjit Singh Reyat, was convicted to 15 years in prison for the bombing.
If it were not for Bolan’s investigations, the Justice system would not be under scrutiny the way it had, causing people to lose faith. 

This type of Journalism was much like muckraking, informing the public of a scandal in order to enlighten everyone of Canada's laws' and policies that failed to prosecute the others involved.

 

                                                  Photo courtesy of www.aerorise.com

Before this book, I wasn’t aware that Canada had even had such threats, and I feel inspired by Bolan’s investigations, especially because she is a woman journalist exploring an Islam world. At times, I found the book to be confusing, only because Bolan crams years of work into 600 pages or so. Interestingly, I learnt that Bolan was a journalist 'rookie,' at the Vancouver Sun when she first started investigating Flight 182, which helped me relate since I am starting out myself, as well.

The CreComm Edition of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

Photo courtesy of dailymail.co.uk

Girls and guys are often accused of being from different planets. Harmless comments often have different perspectives or meanings when it comes to different sexes, I asked people from the Creative Communications program about some comments and what they mean:


You look good today:

Guy: "I look good today? If it's the seventh day in a row wearing a shirt, I know your lying. If you compliment my shirt on the 2nd day I'm wearing it, you want to sleep with me."

Girl: "He think's i'm pretty"

Guy: "Oh f ya. That made my day"

Girl: "He wants to marry me"

Girl: "Do I have something on my face?"

Guy: "She wants to bang me"


It's not you it's me:

Guy: "Are we talking about a fart?"

Girl: "It's definitely me."

Guy: "This is them trying to sugarcoat, there not feeling it"

Girl: "He totally has another girlfriend"

Girl: "He's gay"


Do I look fat today?

Guy: "I plead the fifth"

Guy: "If you think you're fat"....*jiggles stomach*

Guy: "Than she goes eating an entire jar of Nutella..."

Girl: "Such a turn-off, guys aren't supposed to ask"


Your hanging out with the girls/guys again?

Guy: "Well I'm not just going to not hang out with them

Guy: *Put's on glasses* "Deal with it"

Girl: "He loves me!"

Girl: "I think it's his way of showing he cares and wants to spend time with me, so I would probably stay home with him"



Some of these examples made me refer back to the Genderlect Theory. Studied in the 1970's, genderlect can be a tad outdated in some of the examples, although I believe there is substance behind the claim that speech and social norms are associated with a particular gender. Deborah Tannen suggests that part of this conversational difference is because females seek connection and men seek status.

For example, men will avoid anything "emotional," preferring only solid facts. Women generally talk about their feelings and relationships. They speak more about emotional elements, opposite of men, and will expect others to do the same.  When it comes to seeking status, men  label emotion as a sign of weakness. Men prefer to be in objective positions, and tend to 'tell' others more easily than woman. Another example from Tannen is that men thus tend to use jokes and stories promoting themselves when they are conversing with others. Men are said to put themselves in the story, placing themselves as the hero or the person who solves the problem or saves the day (hense status).  In stories that women tell, they are likely to make themselves the victims. They are quick to tell others how they and others have been emotionally hurt. Woman tend to make empathetic connections rather than worry too much about status. Sound familiar? Like I said, a little outdated, but I can see a lot of truth to the theory. Tannen may be on to something.....

Life Hacks for CreComm

When you’re in CreComm, time is of the essence. Sleep becomes foreign, a good solid meal becomes a myth and extra curricular activities are few and far between. Much like we make notes in class, life needs to have a “cheat sheet.” In order to be prepared, you must prepare to be prepared. See the pun? Here are a few hacks that I’ve come across (and used!) in order to keep my sanity, as well as my hair from pulling it out. Thank me later!

You want to drink a beverage, but got no bottle opener? No problem. One major advantage of being CreComm means that you will be 100% likely to carry around a Mac adapter, or should I say "adapter." Mac win's for best multipurpose electronic, we will be raising our bottles to cheers them in unison. Bless Mac's heart. 

Ain't nobody got time for cleaning. NOBODY. Except maybe mom who has no choice when you leave your dirty dishes in the sink. I usually grant myself five minutes for eating in the morning in order to get an extra 3.5 minutes of sleep which will benefit me more through out the day. Want brownie points? Clean the blender for mom, but don't tell her how. With this little trick, there will be no need for Kitchen Counsellor. EAT IT DIRTY DISHES. 

Since wine has many benefits for our health, as well as our mental state on weekends, it's imperative that we know how to clean up ourselves after the top on our sippy cup falls off. I usually drink white wine to avoid this problem, but if you feel the need to be a rebel, here's a little trick to avoid explaining that you WEREN'T in a wet t-shirt contest. Red spills = white thrills. Use any white wine to dab up the stain! Ta-da!

This is very embarrassing. The middle part of a sandal comes loose and you fall on your face. If i can save someone from taking an unnecessary spill, than this Lifestyle Blog is all worth it. I promise you, flip flop spills are never graceful, nor pretty. Friends will be stifling giggles while trying to help you off the ground. Fingers will be pointing at you in a mocking fashion. Save yourself the embarrassment and make your sandals the most bad ass, fail proof weapons of mass destructions you've ever owned!

Firewood is over rated. Doritos is where it's at. This will be an ample life hack and a possibly wonderful survival mechanism if you ever find yourself lost, in the middle of the forest, cold and crying, trying to stay warm in your stylish but inconvenient LuLu Lemon jacket. Always carry Doritos. They can be used for food and fire. Try not to waste them though, burning them is always sad to a hungry, chip savage.

More to come.....

Why I Decided to Expose Myself

Online bullying is one of the main topics today in the world, due to recent jumps in suicide among young teens and adults, declaring that people have belittled them to the point of no return.

This isn’t an easy subject for me to talk about. I was harmlessly bullied in elementary, kids can be cruel at that certain age, something I attribute as part of growing up.

Junior high was a lot better of an experience for myself, I had great friend’s and we all hung out in a big group, everyone was equals.

I had few hard months in high school. At times it was tough to deal with others, but in a way it made it easier to relate to others with social problems, or the stigma of being “different.” It made me a better person in a sense since I stopped gossiping as much and thought before I spoke so that the feelings’ of other people were reconized first and foremost.

In the last year and a half, I’ve settled down with my high school sweetheart and I have been enjoying the last few years of University immensely, proud of who I have become and the work ethic I’ve adopted.

Unfortunately, there are vindictive people who use the Internet to say things that they are too afraid to say out loud. 

The website, nobullying.com reported 52% of young people report being cyber bullied. Furthermore, 33% of the young people who reported cyber bullying against them said that their bullies used online threats.

I was once posted onto a gossip website, completely slamming my character. It was extremely upsetting to not be able to defend myself. 

I went through the initial emotions of devestation, crying, feeling sorry for myself, wanting to defend myself to getting mad. All I kept thinking is, “have I hurt someone so bad that they feel this is okay to do?”

Over the next few weeks and several revolations, I questioned my actions towards other people. Since I have been bullied before myself, I’m extremely careful not to target others the way I've been targeted, therefore, I try my best not to upset anyone or make enemies. I raked my mind and my friend’s list trying to figure out who would have done such a hurtful thing, or who didn't have the guts to just talk it out. 

In the process of figuring out who the culprit was, I mended a few friendships and strengthened others. I realized that it's important not to keep grudges and be more open to other's feelings instead of just my own. 

Finally, after the initial shock wore off, I can 100% say that I just don’t care! The most important thing that matters isn’t who believes the article and the lies the poster wanted people to believe, all that matters is if I love myself enough to essentially brush it off!

My friends and family know the real me and that’s really all I care about. Facts such as my obsession with helping animals, my love for going to the library often to read romance novels and spending as much time with my grandparents during the week to bake are most certainly never posted online, the things that ACTUALLY define me! The whole idea is to pick out negative parts and roast your identity!

I’m not saying it’s always easy to ignore rude comments made towards your image, but give yourself a break, everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes. As long as you are kind to others and apply empathy in the right situations, than you have nothing to be ashamed about.

All you can do to be a better person is to have humanity. Caring about others as you would yourself will make you a better person that people will look up to. If your aware of these things, than you can make better choices that benefit your character.

So why did I expose myself?

Because it’s okay to still be confident and show others that bullying doesn’t have to define you.

You know your getting old when....

The days are gone when I dance the night away in a mini skirt that's two sizes too small and high heels that feel like torture devices. In the past, it would be shameful to waste a Friday night on the couch, watching re-runs from the previous week.

Throwback to eight years ago when I was 19, I would be a few beers deep and just getting my night started by this time. Ah, the perks of being young.

My "going out" clothes, as I like to call them, practically have dust from hanging in the closet.

When the heck did everything change from going out every night and champing hangovers to staying in and cuddling with my cat?

I've always enjoyed spending time alone, for as long as I can remember, I was always the type of girl who preferred to sit by herself and read. But don't get me wrong, when the weekend rolled by, I didn't miss a beat to go out.

Now in the present, I sit here in my flannel pyjamas, with left over remnants of thai on my tyrannosaurus rex t-shirt, my dog on one leg and cat on the other. The biggest problem I have tonight is whether I want to drink Earl Grey or Scarlet Fever tea.

This feels like heaven.

Being comfortable with yourself is truly crucial in order to collect your sanity and find out what kind of person you are. I could spend hours putting around in my room, cleaning and organizing, I also like to scrapbook and watch old movies on Netflix.

I reminisce to some of the amazing times that I've had dancing under disco balls and laughing with friends on Osborne Village patios.

I will always remember these times fondly, but now my life consists of school, my boyfriend, family, close friends' and good food. I also can't ever get enough sleep.

Some may consider it "boring" to stay home on a weekend night and catch up on me-time, but I believe it represents a change in my life towards becoming more independent and comfortable, I'm not afraid to miss out and instead I'm doing what makes me happy.

Besides, if you can't spend time with yourself, who's going to want to spend time with you? :)

                       How I used to feel on a Friday
                                                                                                              phdstress.com

Check out this page:

The 10 Best Things About Spending A Friday Night At Home 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/13/friday-night-at-home_n_3922178.html

Lost My Blog Virginity!

My first post!!! whooo hooo!

Hello all, my name is Courtney Nelson and I wanted to post a little bit about myself so you had a sense of who I am when reading my thoughts.

Instead of writing you multiple paragraphs about what colour my underwear is, I’m going to list ten facts about myself that I consider interesting and important to my character!

1.     Animals: I love ANIMALS! Dogs, cats, monkeys, rabbits, you name it! I have two dogs and a cat whom I would give my unborn child if need be…. which would just be weird.

2.     I hate Turkey: I went to Europe in 2011 and stopped in at Turkey while on a cruise. I went into a Mosque, and in order to respect the religion, I wore long sleeves. This was clearly not enough; as I walked through the doors, I had five men throwing blankets on me to cover my bare knees. Since I am a very dramatic person, I freaked out because I was scared and have never been back to Turkey since.

3.     I’ve been in a horror movie: Not literally, but close. While in Dominican Republic last year, I contracted an immune disease, which led to having surgery in the country. I woke up on the surgical table after being put under, only to find out that I was ALONE. I rolled off the table with my IV and crawled to the big metal doors that said “Salida.” I hurled myself through the doors and screamed for my friends. As they came running down the hall, they were shocked because no one told them I was being cut open and put under anaesthetic. To be continued….

4.     I’ve owned two residences in the last six years: I moved out at age 20 and bought a brand new condominium, conveniently behind a 7-11 establishment. After I consumed unimaginable amounts of hot dogs and five cent candy, I built a house and than sold it within a year because I craved the poor life of a student.

5.     I am a cougar: Not by official standards but I am very aware of the fact that I am a “mature” student, compared to others in my program. At 27 years old, I decided to quit my job at the Provincial Government and take a leap of faith in order to go back to school. So far, I am happy with my decision.

6.     I love reality TV: I could sit in front of the tube with a bag of ketchup chips and continuously watch ridiculously cheesy reality programs for days. Days’ is an understatement, I could watch for weeks! If I could quit my job and watch reality TV all day, I’d totally be okay with eating Mr. Noodle and 99 cent Kraft Dinner meals in order to survive.

7.     I love dying my hair: It makes me feel like a new woman. Every time I went through a break up in my “younger” years, I would run to Wal-Mart for a ten-dollar box of L’Oreal hair dye in order to transform my locks. It had nothing to do with insecurity, I just loved the idea of starting fresh with a new identity. Out with the old, in with the new! UPDATE: My hair has stayed blonde since I’ve been in a year and a half relationship.

8.     I have bad luck: Bring on the pity party, I feel like my bad luck has not only arrived in three’s, but four’s and five’s and so on. From klutzy accidents to unfortunate incidents, I usually get the bad news if there is any around. I also have never won a social prize. My best friend has won 20. Boo.

9.     I love to read: Romance. Romance. Romance. Sigh. I like to entertain my unrealistic thoughts with ridiculously perfect men and woman in perfect relationships. I than like to ask my boyfriend to do ridiculous things like pick me up on dates in a horse drawn carriage, carrying five bouquets of roses and hiding a litter of kittens under his tuxedo flap.

10. I’m an only child: If you see me frail my arms and kick my legs in order to get my way in the middle of class, you may understand where my actions’ stem from. Kidding. Very cliché, but my parent’s are my best friend’s and I have weekly dates with my grandparents. Family is important to me because they are all I have. During my childhood, my father had the unfortunate job of riding with me on all the rollercoasters at Disney World. I plan to have two children to avoid this duty.